Making Me Weepy

If there is anything that can make me sad, it is to hear my little boy(s) tell me that they just miss me and want me to come home.

I receive a phone call at work today from Jacob, "Mama, I just want you to know I miss you," he says very sad-like.

"I miss you too" I tell him.

"I just want you to come home."

"I know baby, Mama will try to be really quick and get out of work as soon as I can" I tell him.

Mark gets on the phone, "He just wants you today. He doesn't feel good and he doesn't want anything or anyone but you."

This breaks my heart. I just wish I could be there. But I can't. It makes me want to cry.

First Steps

For the last few days, Mark has been trying to show me that Kyle can walk. He tells me that during the day, he takes a few steps here and there all the time. However, as soon as I come home, this walking stops.

Tonight, he did it.

Kyle took 3 steps towards me and then a big dive.

It was sweet.

I cried, just a little.

My baby is getting bigger and bigger - step by step.

The Middle of the Night

It's funny, I think it was a week ago now, but I haven't the time I used to have to tell the tales of my funny son, Jacob's perspective of an early morning.

Last week Friday morning, somewhere around 5 o'clock a.m., Jacob ran down the hall and climbed up into bed with Mark and I.

"Dada!" he yelled, waking up Mark.

"Dada, please get me some juice."

Mark grumbled a bit, but got up and got Jacob a cup of something to drink.

Both Mark and myself rolled back over, assuming that Jacob would soon drift back off to sleep as he usually does.

6 o'clock a.m. - my alarm clock goes off - (my alarm clock being Kyle). He is awake for his morning feeding. I sit up in bed to nurse him and who is laying next to me, twiddling his thumbs, watching the weather, WIDE AWAKE, but Jacob.

"Hi Mama" he smiles.

"Hi Silly" I smile back, "what are you doing?"

"Watching the news" he says.

I laugh. Feed Kyle and climb out of bed to wake up the older two boys for school. The bus comes to our house at 7 o'clock a.m. so it's early mornings for us.

I was in the kitchen with the boys, getting them breakfast, when all of a sudden I hear this little voice say, "Mama? What the heck. Why are my brothers eating breakfast in the middle of the night?"

I laugh. I look out the windows and it is in fact very dark at this time of the morning.

"Buddy, it's not the middle of the night," I tell him.

"Yes it is."

"O.k."

"Mama?"

"Yes?"

"Can I eat breakfast in the middle of the night too?" he asks me very slyly.

"I think that would be o.k" I tell him.

Jacob joins Travis and Alex at the table and you could just see by the look on his face that he thought he was getting away with something that wasn't right. It was so cute.

A few minutes later, it was time for Travis and Alex to leave for school. Afterwards, Jacob asked me, "Mama, would it be o.k if you and I snuggled on the couch and watched cartoonies in the middle of the night too?"

"Yes," I said.

"Really?" he asked.

"Mmm... I think so" I agreed, knowing I could use a little quiet time myself.

"That makes me so happy," Jacob smiled.

After we watched a few cartoonies, I needed to get up and get ready for work. But before I left for work, Jacob leaned over, gave me a kiss and a big hug and said, "Mama, tomorrow, do you think you and I could snuggle and watch cartoonies in the middle of the night again?"

I just smiled at him.

"You got it buddy" I told him.

"Goodie!" he said, "Because, Mama, I sure like the middle of the night with you."

Two of Them, Actually

It all started Saturday night with the arrival of Mark's step-mom Betsy and his little sister Emily. A side of our family that we don't get to see so much of as they live quite far away.

Jacob's little eyes got real big and then he ran and hid. He is pretty shy around new people and even more shy around girls. He didn't want them to look at him. He felt mostly safe by Daddy.

After a few hours, Mark and Jacob went outside for a few minutes and chatted a little about Betsy. When they came in, Mark informed us that Jacob had asked him "Daddy, you mean I have TWO grandmas here?"

This was a very sweet thing to hear. After all, since the death of both Mark's and my mother, Jacob has always known that he only had one Grandma - Mama Co. So to him, knowing about Betsy - who is Mark's step-mom and being able to call her Grandma, Jacob was very excited. What was even nicer was that Betsy told him he could call her "grandma" any time he wanted to.

Not much more was said about the "grandma-thing" for the night or the next day. We all said our good-byes and headed our own directions. We probably won't see Betsy again for another year or so as they live so far away.


That night, we finally reached home and went to pick up Jacob's brothers, Travis and Alex.

It took about a minute for Alex to be in the back seat by Jacob before Jacob proudly announced his exciting news to his brother.

"Guess what Alex?"

"What?"

"Guess what I got?"

"Did you get another new toy or something while we were gone at our Dad's?" Alex asked.

"Nope."

"Then what?" Alex asked.

"I got another Grandma" he said.

I smiled from the front seat hearing him say this to Alex.

"You mean Mama Co?" Alex asked.

"No" Jacob said.

"Mama, what's her name?" he asked me.

"Betsy" I reminded him.

"Oh yeah, Betsy" he said to Alex.

"So Jacob has a Grandma?" Alex asked me, knowing that Grandma Jo is really his great-grandma and that the boys have always talked about Jacob not having a Grandma. (This is a sad conversation in our house, but one the boys like to talk about periodically).

"Yes" I said.

To which Jacob responded, "Two of them, actually."

He was so proud.

I was proud for him.