Mommy's Date

O.k, so it's only been a few months since Mark has been gone, but I am learning that sometimes just getting out for a little adult companionship is not harmful.

So I arranged to go out for a couple drinks with a man that I had been friends with since I was 17 years old. He was someone that I have spent time with in the past and felt comfortable with. But first, I had to check with my monkeys. I tend to not want to do anything without checking with them first. I want them to be able to express to me their fears and wishes.

Jacob, now 9, tells me "it's about time!"

Kyle asks if he can come along, "Mommy, I just want to go with you. I want to make sure you are o.k."

It was sweet. I have to admit.

So it's 7:15 p.m. on Thursday night and he pulls in the driveway to pick me up. Of course, all of my monkeys and two of the three from upstairs are outside playing so they have to check him out.

"Mom, just remember, I am here if you need me" Jacob tells me.

Then he pulls me aside and asks me to keep one rule for him "no kissing on the lips tonight Mommy, you need to save that for the 22nd date".

I smile at him sweetly and tell him, no kissing on the lips.

After a great evening of conversation, I arrive home at 11 p.m.

"Hey Mom, what was he like?"

"Did you have fun?"

"Do we get to meet him?"

"Are you going to go out again?"

I felt like I was answering 20 questions from my parents like when I was back in high school. It was so sweet.

Then as I was getting ready for bed, Jacob came in my room and said, "Mom, I just have to know, did you keep my rule? at least for tonight?"

I smile at him and said, "baby doll, I told you no kissing on the lips, right? Don't you sweat it!"

"Phew" he says, "so when are you going out again? You drive me crazy when you are home!"

Memory Lane

It was Saturday night. I had all four of my monkeys at home with me. Lately, they have been finding it necessary to kick me out of the house for a few hours when this rare occasion happens. My 9 year old, Jacob, has been telling me I need to get out, find a boyfriend and go. When I ask him why, he tells me I am driving him crazy - hanging out with him!!

Saturday night was different somehow. We all hung out together and watched National Treasure 2 - which is one of our favorites. We laughed and teased eachother about silly things most of the night.

When the movie was over, I took that opportunity to sit down with my boys to tell them that I knew things had been crazy in our life, but that we were a family - the 5 of us and we were going to make it. Money is tighter than ever and there are a few things - like cable TV - that we have been without and that might have to continue for a few more months. But I assured them, that Mom loved them all and even though I might get a little hard on them right now - trying to get them to help me - things were going to be o.k.

During this conversation, Jacob brought up his cousins, Sarah and Erik. We have not had a chance to see them in nearly 10 years. I told them a little about them, some of the great funny memories I had...

Then Alex, my 13 year old, says to me, "Mom, I remember her. She and I got along really good didn't we?"

I laughed and said, "yes, she was like your little girlfriend".

I laughed some more to myself, recalling the funniest little story about Alex and Sarah when Alex was only 2. You will have to take my word for it because I think he would be far too embarrassed for me to share it just yet, but as I shared it with my boys, they laughed so hard they nearly wet their pants - ALL 4 OF THEM!! It was so great to laugh like with them.

As I went to bed that night, after sharing lots of stories with them, I don't think I could stop smiling. It was so amazing, how staying home that Saturday night provided me with more fun and entertainment than any night out could have given me. After all, those boys, are MY BOYS, my babies and they are truly amazing, and wonderful and sweet - and even though they can get so naughty - I wouldn't trade love like that for anything in the world.

I am so blessed to have them in my life and to be able to share memories and laughter and love.